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History would probably not be so forgiving. She’d be
what Steiner would say. She could imagine him at her side, exclaim- ing, “Why, Beatrix! Loyalty is that for which we knights live!
person to whom one had pledged eternal loyalty became a destruc- tive megalomaniac, was there
still an obligation to follow their word? In the end, she’d decided to swear fealty to Alexandria alone. The plunging waterfalls and sum- mery meadows could not betray her.
afternoon sun beat down on her scarred back. She didn’t know. She couldn’t know. Serving Alexandria had been so much of her life that she couldn’t imagine herself in any other occupation. And what was the point of hy- pothesizing? The past could not be altered. This was her lot, for better or worse.
known as the murderous, merci- less right hand of a deranged queen. No one would care about her personal sorrow, her internal con ict between obligation and morality. The old days of Brahne’s boundless generosity would be lost to the ages. Wickedness and betrayal were much more interest- ing than kindness and peace.
It is the means by which we give our all for the service of the state. There is no nobler profession in all the world!”
In retrospect it was pain- fully obvious. Of course Burmecia had posed no threat to Alexan- dria’s sovereignty, nor did Cleyra. Yet Beatrix had willingly led her armies against both countries. She had believed Queen Brahne long after there ceased to be evidence of international conspiracy.
A lot of bad things could happen when people were loyal. Devastating international wars, for instance. What did it mean to be loyal? Was it the process of offering up the soul for another’s use, no matter how cruel they might be?
It sounds nice, and I think I
want to be loyal, too, but if that means somebody could get hurt, I wouldn’t want to do it...
Beatrix’s complete trust had been her undoing.
Freya told me that a lot of bad things can happen when people are loyal. What does that mean?
Two years ago she would’ve been able to give him an answer. Granted, it would’ve been trite and meaningless, but an answer all the same. Now...
She recalled the swarm of mastodons in the streets only days before. She and Steiner had been back-to-back, facing off the invaders together.
Beatrix passed on her af- ternoon rations to a young woman and her son. Earlier that morning she’d dragged children’s bodies out of a collapsed schoolhouse; she couldn’t bear to eat when so many innocent people had lost everything. She was not innocent; if anything, she was the guiltiest of all. But she had been spared.
“This might be it,” he’d warned her.
Because she had been loyal? Loyalty had brought her an esteemed rank, which in turn had given her protection. Meanwhile, the ones she’d sworn to protect lay dead in the streets.
“I have no regrets!” A lie, a damnable lie. Beatrix had al- ways told herself that it was what she’d say when the end was near, but the more she thought about
it, the more regrets she had. For Burmecia, Cleyra, imperiling the princess, having turned her blade against her partner-in-arms. There were so many things she regret- ted, and all because she had been loyal...
She wondered offhandedly
Loyalty did sound nice. It was nice, in theory. But if a
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If she closed her eyes, she could hear the rattle of his armor. Yes, she decided, that was just what he’d say. Since his rst de- parture from Alexandria he’d be- come wiser and more self-aware, but he was just as dedicated as ever. His absurd sense of opti- mism was what made him strong.
Did she regret ever hav- ing chosen this path? The late
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